Superheroes are Flawed Too
Hello Medium, it has been a long minute and I am sorry for holding back parts of me for so long. Like I always say, writing is a big deal to me because I really share parts of myself with you and so it is important that I unpack my emotions while being whole and authentic with my readers.
The other day, I was watching Zac Snyder’s Justice League with my children and I learnt a couple of interesting things on there. By the way, I did not know that there were two Justice League movies with the same theme until my kids pointed it out to me. So, there I was, being the annoying mum, asking all sorts of ridiculous questions as the movie went on. By the way, my children think I am not cool, and that I embarrass them a lot. (Insert evil laugh here). Now, I make it a point of duty to annoy and embarrass them. How dare they call my flaming hot self, uncool. Anyway, there we were watching Justice League and somewhere in the movie’s plot, they needed to raise Superman from the dead.
What?!?! Superman?!?! Dead??? How??? Was he killed by kryptonite?!?! Too many questions and no answers from those three children who did not have the patience to respond to my confusion and anger, because… uncool mum. Ha! Long story short, without giving any more spoilers, Superman, the most powerful superhero in the world was dead and the rest of the Justice League believed that they could not save the world without him. I wondered, how can Superman be so powerful, yet dead? I also wondered, why did the Justice League feel like they needed a dead superhero to help them save the world? I promise you, too many things in that movie left me scratching my head.
It got me thinking though, the Superman I grew up reading, watching, loving, and crushing on, was flawed. To make matters worse, my son thinks that Batman is the greatest superhero in the DC universe. (Holds head in shock!) How did I fail as a parent that my child thinks Batman is a better superhero than Superman. I blame DC for killing Superman, they caused this.
This is not why I write today though, I write because Justice League got me thinking. Even superheroes are flawed too. The best of us are not infallible and we must create space for others to make mistakes. We should also be willing to forgive and receive them. For the longest time in my life, I held my pastors and a few others in high esteem. I believed that they could do no wrong because they had Jesus on speed dial. Ha! How wrong I was. Then, I got hurt, deeply and badly, by my church and a few other people whom I loved. My heart hurt so bad that I carried resentment for a long time. I was resentful towards them and God. Them, because I wondered why they could not hear me out. Why couldn’t they hear my pain, and why was it easy for them to discard me so quickly? Were my mistakes that bad? Was I so unforgivable? Was I that unlovable? By the way, I still struggle with thinking that I am unlovable. That is another Medium piece, I will share, once I unpack that feeling. Then, resentful toward God because I wondered why God could not tell them about my pain. Remember, I believed that they had God on speed dial. However, I am no longer resentful, I let go of the hurt and my heart is healed now. I have completely forgiven, still trying to forget, though.
Well, I am not sure how the preceding story relates to flawed superheroes. But I am reminded that the best of us are not perfect. The most moral, intelligent, beautiful, and gifted amongst us are flawed. We all have our little quirks. It does not make us damaged goods, it only makes us human. I tried to do a Google search on what it meant to be human and I saw several theological, scientific, psychological, and philosophical takes on what humanity is. Too much. I will say though, that to be human is to understand that we did not come to earth with a how-to manual for life. We are all just winging it as we go. Some of us depend on God, others on the force, and others depend on science. Whatever it is, we all have an understanding that we cannot navigate life without some sort of help. As important as Superman was to the scheme of things, he was dead. The Justice League, earth’s heroes, could not save the world without him and he could not save the world without them.
There are lessons in that movie for us all. We were not designed to do life alone. Whether it is through marriage, friendships, or family, we all need some sort of intimacy or companionship with an(other) being(s). Nobody is self-sufficient. I know a lot of us were hurt by people and some of us by the ones we love and this has made us build walls around ourselves. We have guarded our hearts jealously because we cannot bear the pain that comes from betrayal, disappointments, and dashed expectations. I find it painful when I hear someone say that they are fine going through life without people. Also, bear in mind that we may have caused hurt to others too. I can not imagine living without the community and tribe I am blessed with. My friends and family see me with all my flaws. Yet, they choose to love and support me regardless. I was pulled out of dark places thanks to my community. I have gotten platforms, thanks to my community. I have received opportunities, thanks to my community. My career has experienced exponential growth, thanks to my community.
Please, understand that broken people break people.
Please, understand that even the best of us are not perfect.
We are learning and living.
We all need each other.
We must allow.
Allow ourselves to receive love.
Allow others to be imperfect, and
Allow God to heal our hearts.
Healing is a gradual process but with time, healing happens completely.
As I write this, I am also convicted in my heart because I have held onto resentment without being mindful of the fact that we are all imperfect. I have heard things that I said to people in private repeated to others. Now, as I want to hold on to the hurt caused by betrayal and harbour resentment, I will remind myself of the good things those people did. How they came through for me in the past. I will remind myself that the snafu caused by them does not remove from the essence of who they are and the value they bring to my life.
That said, Zac Snyder’s Justice League ended on a good note, the bad guys were defeated and Superman was instrumental in their quest to save the world. Superheroes are flawed but despite their flaws, they try their best to save the world in the face of extreme danger.
